Rage against the machine…and it’s driver

Another Monday morning commute. At least I thought it was going to be. 1 km from work I see a blue Audi come tearing across the lane (a bike and bus lane I might add!) and then wham!

Normally the next part of the story is about how the driver stops and feverishly apologizes to me. Not this time.

I’ve been out for around 2500 km this year. Far less the I would like but you have to take it where you can get it. With these hours comes a certain amount of bike handling. So this is how it went on that day.

I feel the thud of his rear quarter panel and it clips my wheel. Luckily I don’t go down. Who would do this? What kind of absolute moron would hit a bike and keep driving? I was going to find out.

This is where it the story twists. Alright, I know I didn’t have to catch him or approach him, but this guy had nearly ended my day on the road at 8 am. So I caught up and road to the outside and gave a forceful knock on his window.

At this point he begins screaming at me that I need to F off, get off the road and few other things that I can’t rightfully print. I let him know that he hit me and needs to learn how to drive. Well…I might have been a little more colorful than that.

At this point I was seeing that this guy had no remorse about what he did and was probably would do it again. Then, he did.

I didn’t even register that he was turning his wheel until I saw the car surge right towards me. He hit the gas like it was the start line at a quarter mile track and plowed right into me.

I went down. My bike was on me. Luckily I had bounced and deflected. It wasn’t too direct of an impact. Then as I began to get up and try to process what had just happened I hear this lunatic driver yelling “you broke my mirror…that’s it!” and now this 250 pound maniac runs at me and does a mid-tackle on me.

Now we are on the ground. This monster is on top of me holding my legs. I’m close to giving him a cleat in the face but I know better. People are now out of their cars and yelling at this lunatic to stop and back off. I say the only thing that seems right to say. Almost in a whisper.

“You lay another finger on me and I’ll own your car”

With that he backs up, picks my speedometer off the ground (probably a trophy) and goes to his car. Someone comes over to check if I’m ok and then the lunatic does what he knows best, and he flees the scene.

Nobody can believe it. But with all the chaos going on, nobody gets a license plate. Lovely.

In the end…I’m ok. I’m now a transit rider. I can’t have my family worrying about me every day so I’ll hve to accept defeat and move on.

Car versus bike: Car 1, Bike 0

To you fine driver…I hope I did break your mirror. And I hope it costs a lot to fix.

To everyone out there. Take care out on the roads.



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